Filed under: Al Gore, Ashley Olsen, Audrina Patridge, Britney Spears, Heidi Montag, Justin Bobby, lance armstrong, Nobel Peace Prize, Owen Wilson, Paris Hilton, Soulja Boy, Spencer Pratt, The Hills
It was a good year for members of the doucheoisie. That means, there was a lot of second-hand embarrassment in 2007…and we loved it. Even Al Gore winning the Nobel Prize for his environmental work found a way to be awkward. Here are just a few ways shameful things made 2007 unforgettable…
It was a Good Year for Hills Hangers-on
Justin “Justin-Bobby” Brescia…truly.
Heidi got nose and boob jobs, picked up a CZ and thinks she can be the next JoJo
Audrina got a cubicle!
Our mental picture of Lance Armstrong runnin’ game on Ashley Olsen
Husky Britney at the VMAs
Chris Daughtry sold more albums than anyone else this year
Spencer’s everything, but lately we’ve been focusing on his scraggly beard
Owen Wilson slitting his own wrists
America was “that guy” at the big eco-talks in Bali
Outrageous (aka the Good Embarrassment)
Britney storming out of court screaming “Eat it, lick it, snort it, fuck it!”
The Superman (So boorish, yet, so exquisite)
Paris Hilton emerging from prison and prancing proudly into her mothers waiting arms
Al Gore, Nobel Prize in tow, smarmily accepting congrats from Dubya in the White House, thus creating the most uncomfortable photo-op ever.
2007 dished out ego-boosters left and right, please add to this list.
Filed under: dumbledore, gay, green campus, harvard, jk rowling, Justin Bobby | Tags: dumbledore, gay, harvard
Normally our gaydar’s spot on, but we did NOT see this one coming
This groundbreaking news got us thinking about other fictional characters who are probs still in the closet, but are bound to break out now that Dumbledore’s set the precedent. Here’s our short-list:
1. Sam from Lord of the Rings
4. Justin Bobby
Dumbledore is officially our favorite fictional activist; in addition to finally making homosexuality acceptable in the wizarding world, we’re betting that the legendary principal is also extremely progressive on the green front, making Hogwarts a sustainable campus, and setting the precedent for other campuses worldwide like Harvard , which is currently working to reduce its overall environmental impact. In the same way that Hogwarts saves energy with floating candles and elf-labor, Harvard’s screwing in new energy-saving bulbs, water-saving showerheads, and committing to green building to do their part.
Props, Dumbledore, props. Drizzler
Filed under: George Clooney, Justin Bobby, motorcycles, Sarah Larson | Tags: George Clooney, Harley-Davidson, Sarah Larson
In an interview with People Magazine, George Clooney (seen here with his ridiculously hot girlfriend, Sarah Larson) discusses, among other things, his September 21 motorcycle crash, and his green–and not so green–ways.
Despite suffering a fractured rib, road rash and a banged-up girl friend from his accident in New Jersey, the Michael Clayton star says of his Harley: “It’s my main mode of transportation. I’ve been riding for 30 years, and I’ve had three accidents, which isn’t bad odds. I’ll keep riding.”
On his eco-love, Clooney says: “I’m a big proponent of cleaning up the environment. I have two electric cars. But I also have a big weak spot because I’ve flown on private jets.” Funny, considering Harleys are more harmful to the planet than SUVs.
Unless he’s really a high-flying baller, does this mean Justin Bobby is greener than George Clooney?
Random tidbit: Clooney had a pet pig for 18 years that died recently.
Filed under: Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt, Clinton Global Initiative, Justin Bobby, Make it Right
Do-gooders in all arenas
The Jolie-Pitts are doin’ it up on the Social Cause front …yet again! This time, our favorite power couple has stepped up to the Climate Change and Global Warming podium at the Clinton Global Initiative, an organization founded by the former president.
We’re glad that the significant event attracted a powerful celebrity presence, yet we worry that Jolie-Pitt Inc. may be monopolizing the Hollywood social cause biz. Couldn’t they loosen their vice-like grip on goodwill-ambassadorship and let some other awesome green Hollywood couples rep climate change hard?
Here’s a list of our fave green celeb couples that we’d like to see break into the market:
1. Leonardo Dicaprio & Bar Rafaeli
2. Cameron Diaz & whoever she’s dating
3. Britney Spears and Justin Bobby
….ok sorry we made that up. That’s just weird.. and a bad visual. Chesterman
Filed under: Beau Soleil, Justin Bobby, Lauren Conrad, Melrose Bickerstaff, The Hills
Check out Lauren Conrad’s Viacom-funded fashion line, offering pricier ($130+) versions of your average Forever21 or H&M couture. Come on, LC, we expected a bit more creativity from you. If you’re going to stick with monotone WetSeal-esque (cringe) slip dresses and stretchy white t’s paired with skinnies, you could have at least gone organic like the inspired Beau Soleil green collection. But to your credit, at least the Audrina look-alike model is hotter than Beau Soleil’s Melrose Bickerstaff.
Anyway, we would much rather channel this LC look. Kandz
Filed under: 11th Hour, An Inconvenient Truth, Global Green USA, Green Cross International, Justin Bobby, Michael Gorbachev
Jon Stewart has been chosen to host the 2008 Oscars.
With An Inconvenient Truth winning an Oscar and another year of Global Green’s Red Carpet/Green Cars campaign (celebs show up in green cars instead of limos), the Academy made quite the eco-statement at the 2007 Oscars. With today’s announcement of Jon Stewart as host, things are looking good so far for next year’s show. And while it doesn’t look like The 11th Hour will make much noise come February, we hope even more celebs take part in the Red Carpet/Green Cars campaign in ’08.
Just for the record, we’d be even happier if they rolled up Justin Bobby-style in an El Camino.
FYI: Global Green is an affiliate of Green Cross International, the eco-org founded and chaired by Mikhail Gorbachev. Have we told you about our non-sexual crush?
Filed under: Britney Spears, career suicide, Gimme More, Justin Bobby, VMA, VMAs
Britney needs to get a healthier wig… and clothing.
Points on Britney’s performance:
Number 1: Bad.
Number 2: If she’s not going to sing why does she have to clear her throat in the microphone in the beginning?
Number 3: If she’s not going to sing, can she at least dance?
Number 4: If she’s not going to dance because she feels self-concious about that extra jiggle, can she at least put on some clothes? Don’t put on that bikini if you can’t rock it.
Number 5: Where the hell was Criss Angel? Where was the magic? There was no freakin magic.
Addendum number 7: Do not watch this on widescreen, because everyone was obese. The end.
Addendum 8: Justin Timberlake asked MTV to play more videos, not reality TV shows, with the Hills’ girls onstage. When we heard that we went “ooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!”
Addendum 9: We loved those Chevy commercials. They were mad green. I loved when that fairy blew on those bottles and was like “recycle your bottles and buy a chevy” and don’t pollute.
Addendum 10: We just had four shots of tequila. And it’s not even Tuesday!!!
Drizzler and Kandz
Filed under: all things whack, Fergie, Justin Bobby, Mary-kate Olsen, old people
Why this was a feature on CNN.com is still beyond us, but MK’s gone and done an article about why she never smiles in photos (although who would she be if she weren’t true to her signature pouty-lips.)
“I don’t want my picture taken. The only time I think it’s ok is at a red carpet event or photo shoot.”
“I would love to be able to swim in the ocean in Malibu,”
she says. “But that is asking for a bikini shot. That’s inviting something that I don’t want to happen. I don’t need to be on a ‘Who’s Skinny, Who’s Fat, Who’s Looking Healthy, Who’s Not Eating?’ list.”
Don’t let the man get you down, babygirl. Use it, like the Ferginator, who is auctioning off her Hummer and donating the proceeds to Global Green USA. Cheers to Fergz for mastering the art of simultaneously rocking the pout and a publicity event.
Filed under: carbon emmissions, Justin Bobby, motorcycles, The Hills | Tags: Justin Bobby
The more we watch, the more confused we get
Did y’all watch the Hills last night? Yeah you did, don’t deny it. Let’s do a quick recap: Spencer and Heidi visit the fam in Colorado (yawn), Brody Jenner holds a beach bbq where, surprise of all surprises, Justin Bobby arrives with Audrina and then disappears into the dark of the night leaving behind a unique calling card: Audrina’s helmet with a sprinkle of douchebaggery.
What a baffling young man. We’re not saying that JB’s behavior makes no sense, he’s just trying really hard to be the cool asshole, and we applaude you JB, on a job well done. What we don’t understand is, JB ditched Audrina, who’s relatively pretty, for that busted chick that he kept akwardly cocking his eyebrows at on the terrace. What is Justin Bobby’s deal?
In his show-long struggle to appear confident, cool and nonchalant, JB roars along the highways of Cali on an old-school Harley. Based on initial consideration, the motorcycle may seem to be a green alternative to the Escalades and Land Cruisers littering the streets of LA, however it turns out that motorcycles produce more harmful emissions than cars or SUVs. Wtf?! According to an EPA official, “you could drive the Prius for more than 100 miles before you got to the same hydrocarbon levels the motorcycle would emit in only 1 mile of driving.” Careful JB………Drizzler
Filed under: green lifestyle, Justin Bobby, Laguna Beach, MTV, Newport Harbor, The Hills
MTV’s Newport Harbor suuuuuuuuuuuckkkss.
We were watching re-runs of this shiz yesterday and could not even make it through. one. whole. episode.
Did MTV really think that it could outdo the phenomenon that was Laguna Beach (and the Hills) by moving a little up the coastline and assembling a new brat pack of bottle blondes and madras-short-sporting beach bums? Did they really think that Chrissy and her suspiciously strict parents could ever replace the always extravagant Kristin Cavalleri or the strangely magnetic LC?
Sure Chase and Clay aren’t too bad to look at (in an A&F model way), and Grant is like a mini Spencer, but these boys have got nothing on the real men of Laguna and the Hills. And most importantly, where is the knit-cap-wearing Justin Bobby character? Where is he?
The one good thing about this Laguna wannabe? Atleast they show is still located in the OC, a community that’s environmentally conscious, and very active in getting its wealthy and glamorous residents involved in the green movement. Hopefully, MTV’ll find a way to incorporate that green mindset into the show, if not to educate people, then to give the show some semblance of quality. Drizzler